Sochi 2014 Outrage-Curling Shouldn’t Be A “Thing”

So, yes.  The Sochi 2014 Olympics are still happening.  Most of you only know they are happening because your regularly scheduled programming is being disrupted (#superannoying ).  As I was flipping through the channels the other day, I stopped to see what was going on with the Sochi 2014 Olympics and I was completely OUTRAGED to stumble upon the “sport” of Curling.  Please tell me that I am not the only one outraged that not only is this considered a sport, but it’s an Olympic event!  If this is the case, anyone reading this can have a shot at getting an Olympic medal in life. If you’re in shape, out of shape, short, tall, fat, skinny, fast, slow, young, or old, you too can curl and be a world champion…no real athletic skill required.

Photo Source: Wikipedia
Photo Source: Wikipedia

The Only Stats You Need To Know:

Curling is a hybrid of playing darts, and bowling. A team consists of 4 people.  The first person takes a “rock” and slides it across the ice.  The goal is to get it inside the target.  The other members of your team use ice broom thingys and vigorously sweep in front of the moving rock to add friction and give the rock direction. You play with other teams of 4 and their stones may knock your stone out of the target…And that’s about it.  If you can play foosball, you can be an Olympic curler.

Photo Source: Sports 'N Science
Photo Source: Sports ‘N Science

This is what the Rock looks like.

Photo Source: Brent Wojahn/The Oregonian
Photo Source: Brent Wojahn/The Oregonian

Gliding the rock to the target…minimal energy exerted, you don’t even break a sweat.

Photo Source: Daryona
Photo Source: Daryona
Photo Source: Wikipedia
Photo Source: Wikipedia
Photo Source: Robert F. Bukaty/AP
Photo Source: Robert F. Bukaty/AP

Athleticism may not be required, but STYLE IS A MUST.

 

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